Tag Archive for: Emotional Support

We’re here for Colorectal Cancer Survivors

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By Cheryl Ory, UOAA President

President Biden has proclaimed March 2023 National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month. The American Cancer Society says that colorectal cancer is the third leading cause of cancer related deaths in both men and women. On another note, the death rate has been dropping for several decades. One reason is that treatments have improved. Another reason is that colorectal polyps are now being found more after screening and removed before they can turn into a cancer.

UOAA Advocate, ostomate and colorectal cancer survivor Allison Rosen speaks on the National Mall as part of the United in Blue Rally sponsored by Fight Colorectal Cancer. Video: United in Blue Rally on the Mall (1)

In 2008 I was diagnosed with Stage 3b colorectal cancer. I was told the cancer had been developing for at least 10 years or more, most likely when I was in my early 30’s. There was a polyp, if it had been removed at an earlier date the cancer would not have developed. After radiation, chemo, surgery, and more chemo I am now a colorectal cancer survivor with a permanent colostomy, an ostomy that has saved mine and others lives from not only cancer, but other debilitating diseases.

I’m happy that UOAA is standing alongside partner organizations like Fight Colorectal Cancer to push lawmakers into giving attention to the alarming rise in young people with colorectal cancer.

With younger people being as risk and diagnosed , The U.S Preventative Services Task Force lowered the recommended screening age to 45 in 2021.  One in five colorectal cancer patients is between the ages of 20-54. Talk to your doctor about options for colorectal cancer screening. As the Colon Cancer Coalition states with earlier screening and detection, “Colorectal Cancer can be  Preventable, Treatable, Beatable.”

If you are a person still at risk, like those with IBD, let me urge you to get screened. Screening can result in any colorectal cancers being found earlier when they are easier to treat.

Here at United Ostomy Associations of America (UOAA) we have a long legacy of supporting the survivors of cancer and many other conditions so that they can have best quality of life possible. If your cancer requires a life-saving ostomy surgery remember-you are not alone. 725,000- 1 million people in the U.S. of all ages and backgrounds live with an ostomy.

Every individual person’s disease treatment is unique but ostomy surgery for colorectal cancer may mean a temporary ileostomy (from the small intestine) or colostomy (large intestine). This may be required to give a portion of the bowel a chance to rest and heal. When healing has occurred, the colostomy can often be reversed and normal bowel function restored.  It’s important to know that not everyone with an ostomy will be a candidate for a reversal operation. A permanent colostomy may be required when a disease affects the end part of the colon or rectum.

We have new Living with a Colostomy guide and ileostomy guide to help you learn as much as possible before or after you have this life changing surgery.

It’s especially important to connect with one of hundreds of  UOAA Affiliated Ostomy Support Groups in the U.S. before, or shortly after, your surgery. Peer support and preparation can put you on the path to success in what may be a challenging time both emotionally and physically.  Ask if the hospital has a certified ostomy nurse and insist on having your stoma placement marked before surgery. These and other self-advocacy tools are paramount and outlined in our Ostomy Patient Bill of Rights.

You may feel too overwhelmed as you are discharged at the hospital to fully understand ostomy pouching systems and accessories and lifestyle considerations. If you have a  medical question contact your doctor or nurse, but if you have a quality of life question-UOAA resources here at ostomy.org and peers at UOAA Affiliated Support Groups likely have the answers.

It’s important to learn the facts about living with an ostomy. After the healing period outlined by your surgeon you can swim, bathe, be intimate, travel, and embrace a new normal life. After some trial and error, you may also eat most of the foods you have been able to eat in the past. Education is key to battling misinformation.

Unfortunately misinformation and stigmas surrounding both ostomy surgery and colorectal cancer affect the number of people getting screened or getting the medical treatment they need.  Let’s work together to educate, advocate and support survivors.

 

Cheryl Ory is a colorectal cancer survivor who received a permanent colostomy in 2008. Cheryl is a Registered Nurse who has had a passion for volunteering with the ostomy community ever since and first joined UOAA’s Board of Directors in 2015. She now holds the position of President.

 

 

 

Liz Hiles’ Story

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I  had been increasingly struggling with symptoms for over two years with medical personnel brushing me off because I did not fit the norms for bladder cancer and didn’t check off enough risk factors for it. By the time of diagnosis, at the age of forty, I was perpetually in pain and discomfort, I was periodically urinating blood clots and I was unable to sleep through the night due to the pain and frequent urination. I felt like I spent most of my time and energy running to the restroom. I even had one ED physician laugh at me and assume that I didn’t know my own body well enough to know whether I was urinating blood clots or having issues with my menstruation cycle.

I had my urostomy surgery on September 23, 2016 after receiving a bladder cancer diagnosis on August 12, 2016. I had Stage IV Bladder Cancer with a T4, muscle-invasive tumor.

Having my surgery has allowed me to get back to my own life and start living again…mostly without pain. I’m able to sleep through the night again and I do not spend most of my time running to the restroom.

I have been working in a pediatric GI office since 2012, so not only was I aware of ostomies and that a person could live a long, productive, great-quality life with an ostomy, I also had my very own personal ostomy support crew. My coworkers are amazing and have been so supportive through everything…several nurses have even given me ostomy/stoma care tips and helped me address potential concerns. One nurse, a true-blue friend, even helped me change my bag a couple of times when I first had my surgery and was in rehab!

Finding Support

During my chemo treatments, I first started looking at online resources and started reaching out. I remembered that my WOCN told me there was an active local ostomy support group. It wasn’t until November 2017 that I was physically able to make any meetings in person.

Encountering the Greater Cincinnati Ostomy Association GCOA was the best connection I could have made post-everything. I originally tried to connect with people through the American Cancer Society and the Cancer Support Community, but bladder cancer is sort of a red-headed stepchild of the cancer community. It affects many on a number of levels, but NO ONE talks about. Not everyone diagnosed with bladder cancer has to go through the extreme treatment measures I did, so there are varying experiences within the diagnosis. However, going to the local cancer-focused groups was very frustrating and discouraging for me as most of the people I met there were breast cancer survivors whose experiences did not have any similarities to my own. There were no local bladder cancer-specific groups in my area and there still are not.

When I finally connected with UOAA/GCOA, I found more understanding, empathy, compassion, and comradery in the first meeting than I had in several with the cancer organizations. People definitely made the difference. Online support was okay, but even there I was sometimes frustrated with the set up because it too easily turns into a forum for sharing memes and complaining about their situations. There’s not a lot of educational conversations or intellectual discussions about what I was experiencing, which was something I was craving.

Becoming Active Again

I am still experiencing neuropathy in my feet and ankles as a side effect of the chemo treatments that I will probably deal with for life and I am still working on getting my strength and energy back, but I am gradually reclaiming everything that I did before. I fell shortly after my last chemo treatment and spent about 3 weeks in the hospital/rehab before getting discharged on a Friday and returning to work the following Monday because I had exhausted all of my medical leave and it was either return to work or lose my job. I did not want to deal with the stress of job hunting after all I had been through and going on disability indefinitely was a luxury that I could not afford, so I returned to work completely bald and using a walker. The first day back, I could barely make it from the front door to my office chair. Still, returning to work was one of the best things for me because it forced me to have to rebuild my strength and be active.

I now work 40+ hours a week again with a team I love supporting and I volunteer with the GCOA and Hughes High School, my alma mater, as much as I can. I took over the presidency of the GCOA back in January. I still live alone on the 2nd floor of my quaint, inner-city, 2-bedroom apartment. I enjoy spending time with friends and extended family. Last May, I rented a car and went on a road trip by myself to Columbus, OH to participate in the BCAN Walk to End Bladder Cancer and catch up with some amazing people that I have in my life. I will be taking a plane and train trip in August to attend the UOAA National Conference and go on vacation in upstate New York afterward. I am finally able to start walking and being a bit more active again and have started trying to figure out how to do some of the higher energy things I used to do (like dancing and workout videos) despite the neuropathy, which sometimes makes it hard for me to coordinate my feet. It’s all a process though and I try to take it one day at a time. I’m hoping to be able to take a trip to Argentina in 2020…your attitude and determination are what makes the difference and I’m determined to accomplish things that I have always wanted to do despite the obstacles I’ve had in my past.

Raising Awareness

Both bladder cancer and urostomies are extremely rare and there are huge discrepancies in diagnosis and treatment of bladder cancer, especially with women and minorities. It has been really important to me to bring awareness to both issues because I truly believe that lives can not only be improved, but saved by advocating, educating and raising awareness of bladder cancer and ostomies. So many people immediately think that having your bladder or part of your colon is going to end life as they know it. In part, they are correct, but not in the way that most people think at first thought. People with ostomies can live long, productive lives and be amazing leaders in their communities…just like anyone else. Just because you will always have a medical condition that requires the use of medical equipment does not mean that your life is over. It is different, that’s all. We’re all different though, having an ostomy just makes you extra special.

When my urology oncology surgeon told me that he wanted to remove my bladder (along with various other abdominal parts), I didn’t hesitate at all and said, “Okay. So what’s next?” I knew that my life would be over if I didn’t get an ostomy and I knew that my life would not be over with an ostomy. It was one of the easiest medical decisions I have ever made. He could have asked me if I wanted a cup of coffee it was that easy. That doesn’t mean that I didn’t have struggles and the journey wasn’t a challenge because I did and it was, but I am grateful that I had a choice of life or death and that I was able to choose life so I could get on with mine. Raising awareness for bladder cancer and ostomy awareness means that I could help someone make that life-saving decision that much more quickly and that they would be able to move onto healing and gratitude that much more quickly, instead of being bitter, pissed and depressed over losing a non-essential piece of themselves.

I have raised money, made social media posts, written articles, blog, had discussions, and encouraged others to go outside of their comfort zone to seek support. Additionally, I fairly quickly began being more involved with my local ASG and am committed to thinking outside the box and expanding opportunities to reach people where they are at and, hopefully, encouraging to become/remain involved and to share their own stories.

Staying Positive

I’m alive! I’m not in constant pain and discomfort. I can sleep through the night and not be up every 10 minutes to go the bathroom. I don’t have to do that “gotta go” dance while standing in line for the ladies’ room. I can hook up to my Foley for long trips or binge-watching and not have to move for hours. My bladder does not interrupt me in the middle of the best scenes when I go to the theater. I’m able to concentrate again. I can relieve myself while standing up or writing my name in the snow (gotta see a little humor in the situation)!

My advice is to just focus on living your life. The closer you get to doing everything you did before, the more positive the picture of life with an ostomy becomes. Yes, you can live without those parts and you can still be an active person. Your life and your dreams are still unlimited…it just might take a little extra preparation and planning, depending on your personal diagnosis and situation, but real life and real dreams take hard work, no matter who you are! You have to work for the things in life that you want anyway…no matter who you are or what your circumstance is, but the harder you have to work for something, the more worthwhile, valuable and meaningful it is to you. Only you can make the decision on how meaningful you want your journey to be though.

Overcoming Challenges

Most of my challenges are from my cancer treatments and not from having an ostomy. Still, bending and twisting are sometimes challenges. I do have a hernia that I way too quickly achieved by sneezing and, although it does not typically bother me, it is something to keep in consideration when I am trying new movements or lifting heavier objects. I have neuropathy and slight hearing loss as side effects of my chemo treatments and those are more annoying and challenging than my ostomy issues. Every once in a while, I have a leak, but I generally carry at least a few supplies with me so I just try to catch it quickly, change and move on. I’m really fortunate to have amazing friends, family & coworkers who are really understanding and supportive when these things happen and they don’t bat an eye when I need to deal with these things. Overall, I’ve pretty much learned to have a new definition of “normal” and I take things day by day and slow down when I need to and, most of all, when new things come up, I TRY instead of just giving in.

Advice for those who may need ostomy surgery?

Don’t think twice! No, it isn’t always easy and it isn’t always an easy choice. Sometimes, it’s all very hard. Yes, life will be different, but, in the long run, it’ll be worth it and at least you will still have a life to live.  If you give the ostomy and yourself a chance, having an ostomy will ultimately give you a better quality of life. Also, don’t be afraid to reach out to others who have had similar experiences…that’s how you get through the challenging moments, days, and weeks. Also, I feel like it is critical to share your own story in some way, shape or form. Not only does it help others get through their situations, but it is a great way for you to heal and get through your own story. Sharing your story is a way of honoring yourself and allowing you to shed light on your own strength because many times you don’t realize just how strong you are. Martin Luther King, Jr said, “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” Keeping your story bottled up inside and not even sharing it with the people you love is detrimental to your journey. You matter and so does your story, so share it.

Making a Difference

Last year, I hosted a virtual Run for Resilience Ostomy 5k walk locally and I had 6 humans and a canine share in a beautiful day at a local park. It was great to share my story with people who hadn’t heard about it before while walking. Prior to my own surgery, my team at work and I would wear blue and green on Ostomy Awareness Day in support of the patients and families we care for.

I have grown up participating in similar events and have always found them inspiring and empowering. This year, we hope to have even more participation and invite everyone to meet at a group meal afterward. I will be attending my first UOAA National Conference in August and I’m excited to make new connections and learn more information that will enable me to assist others in getting back into life after receiving an ostomy. I would like to see others get involved in these events because it gives them connections, information, support and empowerment. There is no substitute for making connections in real life with people who have tackled the same problems, fought similar battles, and, most of all, WON. There is strength in numbers and we are all stronger together.

Fashionable Living with an Ostomy

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Our Ostomy Gives Us Power!

Ostomy Visitor talks clothing and embracing life

By Ellyn Mantell

As president of our Ostomy Support Group in Summit, New Jersey, I have met many future ostomates over the years since I have had mine, and we have met in various places, depending upon their health, etc. The one that stands out in my mind is a meeting at a shopping mall a few weeks prior to her ostomy, with Carol, a woman who wanted not only to see the stoma for herself but to understand how it would fit into her life. She loves clothes, as do I, and was frightened she would need not only to purchase a new wardrobe but to change her style of dress.

The best way to show my stoma to her was to go into a fitting room in a store. We brought in some clothes that were of interest to her, and I proceeded to try them on, demonstrating how my stoma (Lily, as I have named her) would fit neatly and snugly under the clothing. I was reminded that as soon as I had my ostomy four years ago, I gave away all of my belts and fitted pants. I was certain I would never wear them again, despite being told that wasn’t true. To the contrary, I saw pictures of great looking women with ostomies online in tight jeans with belted waists. It was just too hard to imagine myself wearing belts and jeans with a pouch, and since these women were not in front of me, I couldn’t ask them “how do they manipulate their appliance to be comfortable and secure?”

Knowing it would have been invaluable to me to actually see an abdomen in clothing, I wanted Carol to have the proper introduction to dealing with her wardrobe. We laughed as I told her of my quest to replace my jeans and belts over the years – since I have learned I can wear almost anything! In truth, my “go-to” outfit is most frequently leggings and tunics, dresses and full-legged pants with a tank, covered by cropped tops. I am what is known as “funky and fashion-forward dressing,” as I learned when I was the fashion trainer for Macy’s years ago, and happily, my style hasn’t had to change due to Lily, who requires a high-output pouch that is so long, and I am so short, that it rests on my thigh!

Wide-eyed, but a little more able to envision her own “Lily,” Carol and I left and grabbed some tea at the nearest Starbucks. We sat and talked about the changes she anticipated and feared, and then she asked me what I really, very truthfully, feel about being an ostomate? Without missing a beat, I very simply said POWERFUL! I told her that as I look around at the many people shopping, I know I have a secret, and that secret is that I am strong, a survivor, and I can help others. Knowing that gives me the most positive feeling, and I am grateful, and want to share it!

I have checked on and even visited Carol as she recovered from her surgeries – since there were a few. Sadly, there is no straight line for any of us, and depending upon the reason for the ostomy, recovery can have many twists and turns. My own led me to need to spend weeks in the hospital and then a rehab facility. But she is improving daily and gaining back her strength and determination. I know she will join our support group or another closer to her home. I also know that before too long, she, too, will be accomplishing her goal of like me, being trained to become an Ostomy Visitor…to meet with and help others learn how to cope with their ostomy, and how POWERFUL they truly are, as well!